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POLITICALLY CORRECT MAN & WOMAN
- She is not a BABE or a CHICK - She is a BREASTED AMERICAN.
- She is not a SCREAMER or MOANER - She is VOCALLY APPRECIATIVE.
- She is not EASY - She is HORIZONTALLY ACCESSIBLE.
- She is not DUMB - She is a DETOUR OFF THE INFORMATION SUPERHIGHWAY.
- She is not an AIRHEAD - She is REALITY IMPAIRED.
- She does not get DRUNK or TIPSY - She gets CHEMICALLY INCONVENIENCED.
- She is not HORNY - She is SEXUALLY FOCUSED.
- She does not NAG YOU - She becomes VERBALLY REPETITIVE.
- She is not a SLUT - She is SEXUALLY EXTROVERTED.
- She is not a TWO-BIT WHORE - She is a LOW COST PROVIDER.
- He does not have a BEER GUT - He has developed a LIQUID GRAIN STORAGE FACILITY.
- He is not a BAD DANCER - He is OVERLY CAUCASIAN.
- He does not GET LOST ALL THE TIME - He INVESTIGATES ALTERNATIVE DESTINATIONS.
- He is not BALDING - He is in FOLLICLE REGRESSION.
- He is not a CRADLE ROBBER - He prefers GENERATIONAL INTEGRATION
- He does not get FALLING-DOWN DRUNK -He becomes ACCIDENTALLY HORIZONTAL.
- He does not act like a TOTAL ASS - He develops a case of RECTAL-CRANIAL INVERSION.
- He is not a MALE CHAUVINIST PIG - He has SWINE EMPATHY.
- He is not afraid of COMMITMENT - He is MONOGAMOUSLY CHALLENGED
MORE FUNNY NAMES FROM ACTUAL FILES
OF THE CHICAGO POLICE DEPARTMENT
How About These Doctors
- Champaigne, age 2
- Chardonay, age 1
- Chablea, age 3 months (All of these children were abandoned by their mother)
- Homicide Byrons
- Philander Rodman, Dennis Rodman's, of basketball fame, father. Philander has 27 children. He currently is living with 2 wives and 15 children in the Philippines
- Weedo Dingledein Dasho
- Zhiavago Rambo - Someone’s been watching too many movies
- Dr. Kneebone, Chiropractor
- Dr. Waters, Urologist
- Dr. Bonebreaker
- Dr. Mangle, Chiropractor
- Dr. Carver, Forensic Pathologist
- Dr. Hyman, Gynecologist
- Dr. Gene Poole
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